Today is apparently the day I quote Joss Whedon a lot. io9.com has an excerpt from the commencement speech he gave recently at Wesleyan University. Hit the link for the full excerpt (and follow it to another link if you want to read the whole speech. But having just finished the rough draft for the sequel to Man Made Boy last night, this bit was exactly what I needed to hear this morning.
I talk about this contradiction, and this tension, there’s two things I want to say about it. One, it never goes away. And if you think that achieving something, if you think that solving something, if you think a career or a relationship will quiet that voice, it will not. If you think that happiness means total peace, you will never be happy. Peace comes from the acceptance of the part of you that can never be at peace. It will always be in conflict. If you accept that, everything gets a lot better.
The other reason is because you are establishing your identities and your beliefs, you need to argue yourself down, because somebody else will. Somebody’s going to come at you, and whatever your belief, your idea, your ambition, somebody’s going to question it. And unless you have first, you won’t be able to answer back, you won’t be able to hold your ground. You don’t believe me, try taking a stand on just one leg. You need to see both sides.